Wishing upon the stars

…as I looked upon the stars, it reminds me that how awesome is He who never leave me nor forsake me.

Thursday 2^nd Sept 2010

To be honest, no one wants feel lonely. This temptation attacked when most of my course mate went home for the Raya break on Thursday (2^nd Sept 2010) and I was forced to stay back for IK EXCO retreat on next Monday (6^th). After receiving a message from Ming Luan that she wanted to meet up to check out Sanggar 12 for our KMR Pesta TangLung, Chris offered us my ticket out for the night; Dinner at Cheras Pasar Malam along with MeiYin, Susan, Jake, ChuanYi. The place was filled with various food and snacks. Me n Ming budgeted rm20 each to spend for the night and we shared and ate to our hearts content. Little did I know, there are consequences to bear. After the wonderful fellowship with my juniors, I went back to have my bath at11pm. That’s where I saw the writing ‘Ada tangan dari lubang’… A few hours later, I began to feel uneasy and my stomach started to bloat. Ignoring the symptoms, I went to sleep. Until 4am in the morning, I rushed to the toilet to empty my stomach content. Then, I know I’m facing my worst nightmare- food poisoning.

On Friday morning, toilet break woke me up at 10am. As planned, I need to go K12 office to pass up my booking form for Sanggar 12. At the same time I needed to go PKU to get some medicines. But later I found out that I still need to go back KMR to get another letter for Pengetua K12 if I were to settle the booking b4 the holidays. What a mess! Thankfully, the Lord provided me the necessary hope and strength. I was able to settle the letter b4 1pm. Next I went to PKU. Caring little Chris was there with his whole gang to check on me before they take their bus to go home. May God repay and bless you all^^. After the check up, Chris brought me back to hostel and I slept silently. At 8pm, I woke up to finish up my left over lunch. Making my way to the toilet again, I locked my room and suddenly, cold sweat rush to my head and losing my vision, I struggle to stand. I had this once in form 5 but this time I’m all alone. As I struggled to standup, a thought came to me and told to lift my leg to lead on the wall to allow blood flow into my brain. I did what was said and, Instantly, I regain my vision. Throughout the night I tried to occupy my mind with things such as movies to help reduce the loneliness. Later, I called home but my mom was at children’s retreat. I chatted with Bryon and hang up.

On Saturday, I was much better. To my surprise, the fan is not working! My laptop can’t turn on! NO ELECTRICITY! Oh God! What a good technique to chase students out of campus.

Until 2pm I endure the heat. And finally God answered my prayer! Later that night, I attended ChangeYourWorld at 6pm in Sunway Conventional with ChengYee, WanYen, SiaoErn and her sis. Y.B. Hannah Yeoh was with us that night. I was inspired of how she can continue to shine for Christ even in politic. To know there is hope is life. I learned that we as Christian should speak life into others, parents shouldn’t discourage their children to join politic, and they can just be our future prime minister! There is opportunity to still change our country, so don’t leave Malaysia just yet…

Sunday I felt bad again. The nausea and diarrhea came back after having milk. I was physically weak and it affects my spiritual walk with God too. Later then, my mum called me and checked on me. She told and advised me on what I should do. Never thought how much I missed her and eventually forgot the remedy to cure my sickness. I thank God for my mother. Love you so so much!!! After hanging up with her, I felt the loneliness again. Knowing I need to do something before bed, I decided to write down the promises of God to remind me of His greatness.

It’s MONDAY! 8am I was all ready to go. Joanne smsed and offered my ride to FBMK so I no need to take UPM bus. I enjoyed the time with Joanne, Stephanie, Christine and Ian. They are so much fun to be with. At 1030am we left UPM and set off to GohTong Jaya. I get to know that it is not easy for Yoke Ling, who starts to serve in FES after her studies in Australia with her sister, as her parents was against it. She has been a blessing to many and I’m glad that she responded to God’s call and is here in IKUPM. Blessings!

We arrived at noon at our destination for lunch. It’s the same place I came for EaglePoint retreat last year around the same season. What a coincidence! We had durian ice cream and cakes but I only took 2 pieces of cold, sweet durian cakes even in my unrecovered condition! Haha! Next, we check-in in Dominic Villa which is a beautiful house of God. It is comfortable and just nice for a retreat. There were a total of 17 of us. 13 girls (Step, Sherly, Joanne, WanMei, MeiYee, Grace, SweShyan, YL, Christine, HeuyLin, Me, ChiowYin n Eliza) and 4 guys(Peter,Ian,CM,Eugene). And it is only RM10 per night. (Excluding meals; vary from RM3 to RM10.) Overall, from the retreat I realized God wanted me to let go of my parents. You may be wondering what I meant by letting go. It means not putting them as first in my life. How do I know it’s from God? Well, it took me some time to recall the verse from

Luke 14:26-27 (New International Version)
²⁶"If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters—yes, even his own life—he cannot be my disciple. ²⁷And anyone who does not carry his cross and follow me cannot be my disciple.

Knowing I have God who gave me everything (including my parents) while I’m nothing, I will learn to do as told! As long as I have Him, there is nothing to worry. My favourite promises is in Proverbs 3

- ⁵ Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;

⁶ in all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make your paths straight.

That evening, while I was sitting with SweShyan on the bus back to Penang, I looked upon the dark sky filled with millions of bright lights. Thinking to myself, God is awesome as He made the earth so wonderful, and I’m alive now because He saved me from that blackout! I am home now because I still have a home. I was alone and He sent me wonderful people. How little lights can make such a big difference... as I looked upon the stars, it will reminds me forever that how awesome is He who never leave me nor forsake me EVER!